How to Give Up The Superwoman Myth

No Superwoman
No Superwoman

Repeat after me:There. Are. No. Superwomen.

Breath deeply and repeat as often as necessary!

I know we covered this yesterday, but a daily reminder can't hurt!  Besides, while it's easy to explain WHY we should ditch the "Superwoman Myth," the HOW can be the tricky part! Even if you're Intellectually Convinced the comparison/competitive game is destructive, changing habits won't happen until you are:

1. Emotionally motivatedAND 2. Have a practical plan*

First off, for those of us who struggle with comparison, the most practical emotional anchor I can offer is to recognize that another person's achievements are in NO WAY a commentary on you.

There are plenty of great moms, cooks, wives, coworkers.

Lots of people are smart, creative, funny.

The world has the need for multiple talented writers, office clerks, pastors, musicians, students, gardeners, teachers, photographers.

Another person's abilities do nothing - zero - NADA to detract from your gifts. Just as George Lucas and Stephen Spielberg both could have thriving careers at the same time, so can a couple of fabulous women. When you focus on using the gifts you have, in the way YOU find most appropriate, your emotional energy unplugs from the comparison cycle.

We should be inspired by those who are doing well. To do so, we have to make different choices. We need to have a plan to identify envy, jealousy, or competitiveness and ditch it for something better. The two most helpful habits feel awkward at first, but eventually become second nature.

#1 - Always Be Kind To Yourself

The amount of negative self talk I hear always boggles my mind. Unplug the stories that say you're "less than" you should be. Identify the lies about needing to be "better" or "further along." You are different from anyone else and that's a good thing! Run away from the media, crowds, or sources that tell you otherwise.

#2 - Always Celebrate The Successes of Others

When someone is doing something you really want to do, don't retreat or pout, but move toward the person. Embrace their success and celebrate. AGAIN, their achievement is no reflection on your gifts. You are unique and awesome in your own right! Blend into the flow of the parade and share the person's joy.

And always remember, in real life no one wears a cape!

*The best book I've ever read on change is called Switch by Chip & Dan Heath, and the Intellectual/Emotional/Practical ideas for change in this post come from THEIR heads, not mine. Read the book!