Fighting For Date Nights


When's the last time you've been out with ONLY your spouse for the purpose of catching up?

No kids. No other couples. Not to shop for the home improvement project. Not to see your kid's game. Not to accomplish ANYTHING except catching up with each other.

Was it two weeks ago? A month? Spring? Before kids?

If you're in my immediate circle of friends, you KNOW how I push this idea.  I ask whether your date nights are happening regularly.  I question you on specifics and challenge you on the "we're so busy" excuse.

Maybe I'm too harsh, but I can't get past the simple idea that if you value your spouse, you will prioritize your time together.

The National Marriage Project says people who continue with "date nights" in their marriage are 3-5 times more likely to say they are "very happy."  Norway is tackling their rising divorce rate by actively encouraging date nights.

These are encouraging facts, but even when you know them, actually making date nights happen WILL feel like work.  Many times you have to fight for every last detail to fall in place.

You beg, trade, pay or otherwise organize childcare to get away.

You get off the golf course, skip the girls' weekend, and pass on the big game to be together.

You skip the kid's event, turn off the tv, and put away the phone to focus on the person you promised to "do life" with.

Isn't it true that the most miserable people you know are those who are in unhappy marriages?  Any marriage can fall apart when it's neglected. Your schedule will never be your ally.

So if you don't have something lined up this weekend or next, get started now.  Send your spouse a calendar invite today.... (don't talk to me about this being unromantic - calendar management is the start to the romance on date nights.)